Christmas Special: Top Ten Reasons why Santa is Better than Jesus

December 25, 2008 — Deacon Duncan

Just in time for the holidays, here are the top ten reasons why Santa Claus is better than Jesus:

10. Santa laughs more.

9. Santa does not demand your time, your obedience, your worship or your money.

8. Santa doesn’t expect perfection, and even if you screw up, you start the next year with a clean slate.

7. No one was ever burned at the stake for translating the story of Santa into the language of the common folk.

6. Santa’s not all hung up on sex.

5. Santa comes once every 12 months, not occasionally every few thousand years.

4. Santa doesn’t try to “prove” his love for us with some bizarre ritual self-destruction.

3. Santa doesn’t start wars with people who say “Happy Holidays.”

2. Santa doesn’t judge people’s moral character by whether or not they believe in him.

And the number one reason Santa is better than Jesus…

1. Santa doesn’t make you wait til you’re dead before he brings the goodies.

 
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Posted in Amusements, Unapologetics. 3 Comments »

3 Responses to “Christmas Special: Top Ten Reasons why Santa is Better than Jesus”

  1. Dave Says:
    December 29, 2008 at 10:53 am

    We can see Santa, and ask him for stuff, not in church, but in our local department store.

    If we can stay awake, we can see Santa in action on Christmas Eve.

    We don’t have to drink his blood or eat his flesh, but we can, at our option, leave milk and cookies out for Santa.

  2. harebell Says:
    December 29, 2008 at 6:21 pm

    Also any one of us can play Santa without being denounced to death as an apostate.

  3. John Morales Says:
    December 29, 2008 at 7:15 pm

    harebell, there’s this:

    Father wearing Santa Clause outfit, who came to pick up his daughter from a night club in south Tel Aviv, set upon by gang of youths
    Natasha Musgovia Published: 01.03.06

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